Sometimes you’re meeting someone who is obviously faking a certain behavior.
There is just something about them that doesn’t seem right.
Maybe they are way too friendly or they seem way too interested in you.
It’s obvious to us that those people are acting and that they are not really showing their true self.

The truth is that most of us do the same thing on a daily basis.
Maybe we’re not acting to an extend where everybody can read it immediately but we’re definitely not being ourselves.
Let me give you some examples:

Are you the same person when you’re in a job interview vs. when you’re signing a gym membership? I don’t think so.
Do you talk to your best friend the same way that you would talk to a police officer when being in a security check at the airport?

We are all actors at some points in our lives.
It’s not necessarily a bad thing but being aware of that will help you to see through people’s act and it will help you to understand someone’s true intentions.

How to see through people’s masks?

Admittedly not everybody is the same and not everyone will put on a mask so obvious that you’ll be able to detect it immediately.
Some people are better than others and usually the higher up the ranks people are, the better they are at hiding their true emotions.

There are certain things you can do to become better at reading people.
The most important thing is by experience.
Being able to read people is a skill that requires practice.

How to uncover the mask

1. Detect micro expressions

2. Analyze their intentions

3. Observe how they act around others
   

Detect micro expressions:
Even though there are many people that swear on reading body language, I’m not the biggest fan of trying to read certain behaviors.
It’s easy to detect anxiety and anger but certainly not because of one or two signs in body language. It’s a mix of facial expressions, body language, tone etc. that make us aware of a person’s state.
The problem with this is that it can be faked.

What is very difficult to fake is a micro expression.
A micro expressions only lasts for milliseconds and is therefore not easy to detect. Reading micro expressions comes with practice.
If you tell someone that you achieved something great, you’ll most likely detect a very small initial reaction, usually something with their eyes.
This will tell you if they’re happy for you or if they’re being jealous.
You will definitely become better at reading those emotions over time.
Knowing someone makes it also easier than meeting someone for the first time.

The name of the game here is called careful observation.

Analyze their intentions:
If you can manage to find out what someone’s true intentions are, it will be easy to detect if their behavior goes hand in hand with their end goal.

You have to ask yourself the question:
“Why are they behaving in that particular way?”
Distinguishing between actions and underlying motivations is only possible if you know what they want to achieve and if you figure out what their true intentions are.

Observe how they act around others:
People act in a particular way around certain people.
The easiest way to detect someone’s true character is by observing how they act around different people and how they behave when no one is watching.

Someone who is very friendly with you but treats a waitress poorly, is most likely not a good person and is faking the nice guy act when interacting with you.

Next time someone is smiling at you, watch how fast their smile goes aways once they think that you can’t see them anymore.
If their smile leaves rapidly it means that it was fake.
It’s unnatural for our face expression to change immediately when we felt joy.

The eyes are the best mirror to someone’s soul.

In conclusion

Just because someone is saying something nice doesn’t make it true.
You should always ask yourself what the other person’s intentions are.
Finding out what their end goal is, is essential when it comes to analyzing and understanding their behavior.
Micro expressions are a very powerful tool when it comes to detecting how someone really feels. There are people that can fake even that but to be honest those people are very rare and are most likely psychopaths.
Most people can’t fake a face expression from the very first millisecond, since the brain needs a little bit of time to process new information.
The more shocking the new information for the other person is, the easier it is to detect how they truly feel.

The funny thing is that many of us are not bad at reading people.
We simply have to be more aware of their reactions, behaviors and their true intentions and goals.

Thank you for reading.