Do you know those people that lose it completely when something goes wrong? I believe we’ve all seen someone who panicked at an airport because the gate of his flight changed. They panicked so much that they couldn’t see that it changed from Gate 3 to Gate 4, which was only 3 meters to the right.

When we’re in a very stressful situation our body produces adrenaline. This brings on a number of physiological changes like increased heart beat and blood flow. Pulse rate and blood pressure go up and something happens that we have all witnessed when someone is panicking- rapid breathing or hyperventilation.

If you can manage to control your emotions you will be able to react calmer and make way better rational decisions.

If you remain calm in a stressful environment you will come across as if you have everything under control. Outsiders will trust that you are competent and that you know what you’re doing.

What is it that many do wrong?

In my opinion there a two main reasons why some of us can’t handle stress.

The first mistake is to overthink every potential outcome. Imagine something that didn’t go as planned. Many people take that scenario and immediately assume worse will happen. You go over ten different scenarios that could follow. Most of the time it will eventually be fine.
When being stressed 95% of our thoughts are ideas of what could happen.
By the way this is also the number one reason that keeps people awake during the night.

The second mistake is to worry about things outside your control.
You can’t control if your company goes bankrupt or your customer doesn’t show up to an important meeting. So why even stress about it?

Staying calm under pressure is a skill very few possess. Usually those people are in politics or high leadership roles. Why?
If your boss stays calm you will get the feeling that everything is under control and you’ll stay calm as well.

Let's dive into ways to stay cool, calm and collected.

How to do it

Here are some things I recommend doing:

1. Don’t worry about things you can’t control

2. Breathing

3. Meditation

4. Don’t allow other people to stress you

5. Do more challenging things

How to execute

Don’t worry about things you can’t control:
In life there are some things you can control and some things you can’t control. Even though you don’t want to hear it, some things we simply don’t have control over.

Imagine you are at work and 3 of your colleagues are not working due to sickness. Worrying about what bad things could happen to you during that period of time won’t help you. You don’t have any power over what might happen during those days. The only thing you can control is your own reaction and the job that you will be doing during that time.

Breathing:
The sympathetic nervous system controls your fight-or-flight response.
It is responsible for being alert when you have to be. It does that by signaling the adrenal glands to release stress hormones like adrenalin and cortisol.

Deep breathing has been shown to calm the sympathetic nervous system down and therefore reduces feelings of anxiety and stress.

I love using the 2-1-2 method.
2 second inhale - 1 second hold - 2 second exhale.
My recommendation is doing that for 15-20 reps when you feel anxious or stressed the next time.

Meditation:
While the 2-1-2 breathing method is something you can do in an environment of stress, mediation is something you can do regularly.
You can almost say regular meditation increases your stress threshold.

Close your eyes and focus on your breath for 5-10 minutes everyday is all it takes. It’s normal that thoughts pop into your mind here and there. Once you realize that you lost focus on the breath simply shift it back to your breathing.
Don’t worry you will get better over time.

Don’t allow other people to stress you:
Many times colleagues, bosses or customers can be very anxious. Many of them try to move their stress towards you to get rid of it themselves.
The sad truth is that certain leaders use stress as a tactic to improve their employee’s performance with no regards to their health of mind.

Don’t allow that to happen. If you look around your workplace I bet there are people that are so cool and calm that nothing can irritate them. That’s how you should try to become.
Remember no one can make you feel stressed or anxious.
Feelings come from the inside, so you’re the only one who is able to control that.

Do more challenging things:
All the things above will definitely help you to stay calm.
There is one more thing you can do though.
Handling stress and reducing anxiety is a skill like everything else. The more you do it the better you get at it.

Putting yourself in uncomfortable situations like speaking in front of a big audience or talking to a stranger in a supermarket will increase your confidence and will help you with handling anxiety. The more you speak in front of people, the better you will get at it and the calmer you will be.

In conclusion

It doesn’t matter if you’re doing things that prepare yourself for high pressure situations or techniques you can use to decrease anxiousness in a stressful environment. Always remember that staying calm is a choice you make.

Stress is the bag of bricks you can pick up in the morning and let it weigh you down or you can just not pick it up. Not getting stressed is a decision you can make for yourself.

Thank you for reading.